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By - November 4, 2010

Matty’s Corralled Thoughts

Republican candidates were swept into office this week on the wave of people wishing to put the brakes on the rocket sled ride to debt hell that the Obama agenda has given this nation.  My advice, we have entrusted you guys again, try not to screw it up this time.  Obama in a speech said he was looking forward to working with the Republicans “to find common ground, move the country forward, and get things done for the American people”.  My guess this will last about a week.  He is headed out of the country on a bash USA Tour to Asia. Then he will return to America and start accusing the Republicans of stopping the government, etc…. In his press conference, he was about as contrite and believeable as Charlie Sheen was at the last domestic violence shelter groundbreaking…

Just two days after the election shellacking, the President is leaving the country.  Rush has suggested he is going into exile.  Obama is taking his entourage, of hundreds, in over 40 commercial, private, and government aircraft.  I would do an inventory count of the china before and after the trip just in case.  Obama has requested an additional  34 warships to patrol the Asian coast for his 10 day “feel good” trip. I believe he is going on the trip to ask for more allowance money. The estimated cost per day was once reported as high as $200 million and has since been lowered, but that was before the warships were added.  Asian countries own about 47 percent of  the US Debt,  so maybe we are taking that many assets over to Asia in hopes of pawning them as collateral…

India is taking no chances on security when the President visits.  they have started to clear all the coconuts out of the trees.  Every year people are killed by falling coconuts and the Indian officials wish to avoid an international incident by having a coconut hit our President.  Indian officials have also started to build a 30-foot jungle surrounding the President’s hotel in order to protect him from terrorist attacks and the tribes of the red-bottomed bhandar monkeys who reguraly overrun government office compounds.  Obama officials have likened them to TEA Party activists.  Delhi’s police will also use commandoes, monkey catchers, and snipers to dismiss the vagrant monkeys in the area.  At least they are not recruiting finger biters like the MoveOn.org have for protest parties…

I am proud to announce that the McRib is back on the McDonald menus for a limited time.  These bbq handgernades were a staple in my diet while I was growing up.  No word yet on the McDLT.  All of this while San Francisco just banned  the “Happy Meal” from the city borders.  I wonder if this includes the ultimate Californian Commie happy meal- Mao suit, the book “Rules for Radicals“, seeds for growing your own pot, and an assortment of Love Gloves

And finally some ironic justice came to a Nebraska Halloween reveler. Matthew Nieveen, dressed as a breathalyzer for Halloween complete with dinosaur pj bottoms, was arrested and charged with DWI and minor in possession of alcohol. Mr. Nieveen wished he went with his first idea ‘as the Invisible Man, then the cops would have never seen me’.  You can’t fix stupid…


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