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By - September 29, 2011

Matty’s Corralled Thoughts

Florida, in an effort to become a larger influence on the presidential nominating process, is considering a move of its presidential primary to January 31, 2012. The move would be in direct violation of primary rules set forthby the Republican National Committee. The RNC has barred any state other than the first four ( Iowa caucuses, New Hampshire primary, Nevada caucuses, South Carolina primary) from holding its primary before March 6, and said it will penalize any state that violates the rule with the loss of half their delegates to the party convention in Tampa, Florida.  Iowa is committed to move their primary to as early as Thanksgiving, if needed.  Like we need two turkeys at that time of the year.  Delegates have been forfeited in the past, I would rather the RNC take back the McCain and Dole nominations instead…

Bank of America, the nation’s largest bank , said it will start charging its customers a $5 monthly fee when they use their debit cards for purchases. Various other large banks, you remember the ones that were too big to fail, have followed suit and will be charging similar fees. Banks are claiming the Dodd-Frank financial overhaul law has put them into a corner because they will now be limited on the fees that banks can levy onto a merchant when a customer uses their debit card. The new limit is expected to cost the banking industry about $6.6 billion in revenue, or about $8 trillion less than Barney Frank’s banking oversight committee has cost the country.  He sure loves his Bills. You gotta love how the bank is borrowing money at almost 0% interest rate, and charge their customers 7% to use their own (tax funded bail out) money, unless you are counting the generous 1.13% CD’s offered. Just another reason one should bank with their own hometown bank or credit union…

Jackson asleep without his beloved chimp Bubbles

After more than 2 years after his death, the trial of Michael Jackson’s doctor, Dr. Conrad Murray, has completed its third day. Dr. Murray is being accused of involuntary manslaughter by “gross negligence, medical abandonment and repeated incompetence”. The defense has argued that Mr. Jackson self-administered a hospital anaesthetic (proposal) along with enough sleeping pills to put six people to sleep in an effort to conquer his insomnia. Couldn’t he have listened to his last album? a good night’s sleep always made Michael “feel like a new boy, today”. The doctor was receiving around $150,000 a month from Michael and all the Jesus Juice he could drink. I would anticipate an acquittal at the end of the trial and the lawyers will be bumped into higher income brackets next year. . The world surely misses the man who had more noses than Mr. Potato Head…

Are you willing to drink frog juice to improve your love life? A small smothie shack in Peru believes it has found the ultimate aphrodisiac. The stand has been selling about 80 drinks a day, for the last 15 years, The Lima locals and such celebrities as Bill Clinton, Tiger Woods, and half of the players in the NBA believe the frog juice concoction brings great virility. The juice contains the entire frog and more than 20 other ingredients placed in a Jack LaLanne Power Juicer. As Jack would say, ” remember to save the pulp. It can be used for soups, sauces, and cookies! ” I had a chance to try this just the other day and it made me jumpy…

A frog juice smoothie pick me up

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