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By - January 9, 2013

My New York State of Mind

"I am against all women on the right"

I cannot stand Gloria Steinem…she reminds me of Schelprock from Pebbles & Bam Bam Show….the guy whose mere presence “woowsie wowsie whoah” would cause crowds to flee and buildings to collapse.

Director David R. Ellie died this week. Anyone remember the movie Snakes on the Plane? I never unintentionally laughed so hard at a movie in my life! Friends say his health plan was lacking. All he had was Cobra. He also directed The Final Destination. Looks like his will be a cemetery.

I’m developing a reality series featuring older divorcées in the woods competing for breast implants. I’m calling it “Cougar Melon Camp.”

Now that Al-Jazeera has bought Algore’s Current TV, they have some fabulous programming lined up. They’ve got a new show called “Storage Jihad.” They have “Project Burka.” And a show called “Real Virgins of Fallujah.”

Putin has made new adoption laws in Russia- I guess since you can’t adopt Russian children anymore, you will just have to wait until they are old enough to be a mail order bride.

Ireland is coming out with its own version of the show “Cheers.” Yeah, a sitcom about people who sit around drinking at a bar all day — or as they call that in Ireland, “Reality TV.”

My weekly Twitter brush with greatness- While hawking his book around America, Al Roker told his audience that he pooped his pants while visiting the White House in 2002.  He blamed it on gas, but I have inside information he bought a gas station burrito before George Bush’s Inauguration.  I asked Al “how is your A&&hole doing?” he told me “just look in the mirror and let me know”. Al Roker 1 Rochester Guy 0. Well played Al.

White House workers taking Al Roker's underwear to the curb.

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